Have a go

I have a great affection for people who persist in doing things badly.  I don't mean people who deliberately do things badly, like how some people ridicule other people's fan-fic by writing deliberately absurb piss-takes on it - that's just mean.  I mean people who aren't very good at things but keep doing it because they love it and they don't particularly care what some other judgemental people might think.  It's a great virtue in my book.

I like to see people paint drab watercolours and get it all wrong.
I like to see fat people at the gym trying out new classes.
I like to see unco people play sport.
I like to see old people dance.
I like to see middle aged people stab away at the piano keys.

When I was younger I also liked those things, but I liked them because it made me feel (falsely) superior to them, because (I convinced myself that) I could do better (if only I tried).  As a result, I didn't do anything except the stuff that I could do well.  Which meant that I missed out on a lot of opportunities to try new things.

Now that I am old and wise, I like these things because they remind me that I'm not so good as I think I am, so I might as well just enjoy life for what it is.  It's a whole lot better, let me tell you.

The reason I've been thinking about this stuff is because I was pretty hopeless at medicine today and I needed to reassure myself that it was okay.  It was my second day on the wards and I rocked up at some ungodly hour (does God get up at a particular time?  Does he like daylight savings too? Who's in charge when he's asleep?) and the RMO started firing questions at me that I was forced to parry and stall so feebly that it was humiliating.

RMO

So what causes seizures?

PTR

Well ... lots of things cause seizures.  ... Like ... drugs!

RMO

What drugs?

PTR

Um... the ones that mess up your neurotransmitters and ... that's all.

RMO

Hmm, okay.  What else?

PTR

Metabolic things.

RMO

Like?

PTR

... I don't know.

RMO

What makes a cell fire?

PTR

Electrolytes!  If your electrolytes are wrong then the membrane potential will be wrong.

RMO

Which electrolytes?

PTR

... Gatorade?

RMO

Go and stand in the corner.