I think I've figured out how our not-for-profit gym is going to make profits. They're going to exploit the magic of negative numbers!
As previously mentioned, they won't let us join. Since we go to classes and use their equipment, they actually lose money every time we turn up.
But tonight we didn't make it to our regular punchy-kicky class. The numbers have been steadily dwindling, actually. A few weeks ago there were about 15 people in the class. The week after it was 6. Last week there just 3 of us. So this week I'm pretty sure the mathematics would predict just 1 person. But since me and my Smaller Half didn't show, that means that they actually had -1 (ie: negative one) people in their class. And it's just going to get worse!
But that's all part of their cunning plan, you see! If they have enough people like us who they lose money on, and they run enough classes with negative people turning up, that means that since a negative times a negative makes a positive, they'll actually turn a handsome profit without even having to lift a finger!
I like it so much I'm going to buy the company!
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2 comments:
Do you think they'll insist on charging you a negative price for their company? Or perhaps they'll just compensate you handsomely for the inconvenience of having their shares?
Hmmm, good questions. I think that rather than buying a share of their negative capital, I might instead invest in a portion of their future positive profits.
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