Here's how it works:
- Patient presents with diarrhoea. (All patients present with diarrhoea.)
- Doctor takes detailed history about things apparently unrelated to poo, such as tattoos, sexual practices, blood transfusions, and whether patient has ever worked as a paprika splitter.
- Doctor advises patient to wait a week.
- Patient re-presents in a week with the same symptoms.
- Doctor sends patient for colonoscopy.
- If anything like a lump is found, whip it out.
- If no lump is found, patient is put on steroids.
- If the steroids don't work, doctors keep alternately removing pieces of the patient and putting them back on steroids until something different happens.
- Oh yeah, tell the patient to try not eating wheat just to see if that helps.
It drives me nuts to try to remember stuff about so-called enterchromaffin-like cells when I don't even know what the hell this so-called enterochromaffin is. Maybe it's something I've forgotten from last year, or maybe I was sick that day in high school when everyone learned about enterochromaffin. Like that time when I missed the lesson on complex numbers and was lost for a fortnight. "The square root of negative one? That's crazy-talk!"
Hmm, hang on, contrary to the last post I have just sat here whinging about my study. Oh well. Toughen up people, you'll be reading a lot more of this stuff from now on as from day to day I learn more and more about just how badly my goose is cooked.