Tuesday, February 24, 2009

If you have upper right quadrant abdominal pain while you're above the Arctic circle you need to read this post

Today I was swarmed by unruly mobs of angry medical students. They demanded that I retract my allegations that they have heads like roosters. After several rounds of being told to kiss Boron's Medical Physiology like I meant it or get a punch in the face, and then getting punched in the face anyway, I came to realize that I had grossly defamed them.

I'd like to make it clear that the incidence of cockheadism is lower in the medical student population than in society at large. Furthermore, they are handsome, charming, generous to the young and the elderly, and care for library books like they were their own and seldom cut pictures out of them.

I would also like to apologize for the eskimo language in the last few posts. Sorry. And by "eskimo", I'm referring to the usage in the novel "Cheaper By The Dozen", which bears no resemblance to the terrible film of the same name that I have not seen except for the fact that there are twelve children in each in which "eskimo" means language which is crass or coarse.

Speaking of eskimo, (hey, nice segue) did you know that eating a diet high in fat (for example, whale blubber) can give you gallstones? And did you know that you can treat those gallstones by supplementing your total bile acid pool to redissolve those stones? And did you know that you can do that by drinking bile? And did you know that ursodeoxycholic acid is a component of bile which is especially effective at dissolving gallstones? And finally, did you know that ursodeoxycholic acid is particularly abundant in the bile of polar bears? And who has the best access to polar bear bile in the world? (Apart from polar bears?)


Some day, knowing that might save someone's life.

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