Tuesday, September 6, 2011
New adventures in cheese
Like you, I bought a big block of Nimbin cheese today. No, "Nimbin cheese" is not some kind of euphemism for psychoactive substances. (For those of you not from Australia, Nimbin has the widespread reputation, rightly or wrongly, as a hive of hippies with heaps of hemp.) Nimbin cheese is in fact a cheese produced in Nimbin.
I was so surprised to see it right there in the stupormarket that I bought it without really thinking about it. I don't even know what type of cheese it is. Presumably it's a tasty cheddar or something similar. Gets up to look in fridge ... oh my god - it's something called "Elbo style cheese". Eurgh. I know that Elbo cheese must be a real and delicious thing, but the name is very unappealing, sounding like the consequences of a long-neglected personal hygiene regimen.
Anyway, I think that the reason I bought it was because of its colour. Sitting there on the shelf amidst the other (non-elbo-style) cheeses it really stood out. Yellow, dark yellow, yellow, pale yellow, green, yellow ... wait - green???
Yes, Nimbin cheese is green. I was so enraptured that I threw it into my basket without a moment's further thought. I thought about it all the way home though. This cheese, from the home of the hippie, is a triumph of marketing. Distinctive name, distinctive colour, colour has multiple connotations directly linked to the distinctive name (green = eco & green = dope). The only comparable idea I can come up with right now would be to sell a Tony Abbott blue. But the idea of somehow extracting milk from Tony Abbott to make it is an even worse concept than Elbo cheese.
Which is why I was so bitterly disappointed when I got home and unpacked the shopping and found a plain old boring block of pale yellow cheese in my bag. Had I grabbed the wrong cheese off the shelf in my excitement? Was the green colour just a product of my fevered imagination when I read that it was Nimbin cheese? Was I stoned out my mind?
No, no, and no. It turns out that Nimbin cheese is not green at all. It's just ordinary looking cheese inside a wrapper which is green on the front and clear on the back. Man... I've obviously read Green Eggs and Ham one time too many.