A rare photo of my cousin twice removed, Warren, taken at the age of 30. This picture was a publicity shot for his prog-rock power trio, The Ottoman Corsairs, in which he played the electric lute. Warren was a high school music teacher by profession but was sacked after a scandal in which he was found to have stolen melodies from the homework of a Japanese exchange student. Fleeing Australia for the United States of America, he was last known to be earning a living penning aphorisms for football commentators and may have been engaged to an ornithologist.
A raging Bruxist, I grew up on an ostrich farm until I was mistaken for a woman one time too many. Leaving my angsty post-teen life as one of three only children, I flew to Stockholm where I unexpectedly won the Man Booker Prize for lengthy blogging about being short. I'm perplexed to report that I like painting tiny Romans.